


Homesick

by Delia_Sky



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Cheesy, Kuroo humiliating himself (that poor soul), M/M, Post Break-up, me mixing up grammars like a boss., my bad attempt on humor and being witty, rest assured, there will be happy ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-05
Updated: 2015-04-05
Packaged: 2018-03-21 09:18:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3686811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Delia_Sky/pseuds/Delia_Sky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s just homesick. But, damn, he might as well call himself a homeless because Tsukishima was his home.</p><p> </p><p>a k a, kuroo broke up with tsukki to study aboard and now he's trying to fix things but sadly failing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Homesick

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is unbetaed, so there's bound to be some mistakes. I'll edit it later. Maybe. After I'm done with being done with life. Sorry.

“It’s just homesick,” his friendsaid. “Just homesick.”

Maybe it was, or maybe his friend was wrong, or maybe the universe is just one big mess of fucked up sentient mass who liked to fuck his life.

Or maybe, his friend was right and the universe was fucking with his life, which would make it a double attack and he curses quite loudly when he stubbed his big toe while contemplating his life choices as well as the probability of this is just universe fucking with him again.

_What is this even…?_

“Hey, Kuroo!”

He doesn’t like how his name rolls off the tongue of the people here. Not that he hates the people. He just doesn’t like it. It’s weird. It sounds off to his ears. It’s like there’s an extra ‘w’ on his name and that makes his name rhymes with ‘burrow’.

He’s decided. Going to America was a big mistake. He overdid it. If he just wanted to run away from the fucked up family matter, he should’ve got another alternative, not this one. Never this one.

_“You could’ve moved out! Rent a cheap apartment or something! Say it’s easier than having to take the train! Anything! You’re clever, why can’t you figure out a way?”_

_“Or maybe, you could be nice for once and stop making me choosing between myself and you!”_

That was the stupidest thing he’s ever said and like hell he’ll get another chance to ever say it again.

“Kuroo? You’re okay, there?”

“Ah? Eh? Nan— what?”

“You’re not eating? Is it that bad? I didn’t think I messed up that much. Man, cooking is hard, dunno how you do it.”

His friend talks too fast and, though he’s lived with Andrew for almost a year, the brunette’s words sounds foreign to his poor Asian ears. God, he misses Japanese. He misses salted grilled mackerel pike. He misses volleyball. He misses Kenma though only two days ago they talked over Skype.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Sorry. Just out of my mind for a moment.”

Even though he can talk the language just fine, it just felt weird.

He spoons the soup in his bowl. Miso soup. Only too light. But that’s alright. He downed on his food quickly, nostalgia hits him like a wave. His Old Man’s miso soup at home was the best.

This one’s too light, not enough flavor, a bit too much salt.

“You like it?”

“It’s good enough.”

“Found some miso at Chinatown, thought you might like it. Though… isn’t it weird? Miso’s from Japan, right? Why’s there some in Chinatown?”

“Beats me.”

Andrew flicked his wrist.

“Ow! What was that for?”

“You told me to.”

“Seriously?”

The brunette strangely reminds him of Bokuto. Somehow. Maybe next time he should just bring his friend over to Japan and introduce him to Bokuto as the ex-ace’s long lost brother.

He misses the stupid banters he had with Bokuto. He misses how they riled Tsukishima together, calling him ‘Tsukki’.

And—gods, why?—he misses Tsukishima.

* * *

He doesn’t know how he ended up here.

After a sorry excuse of; “I kinda have a family matter going on, so I have to go home. Sorry, you’re spending summer alone, bro,” he found himself back in Japan with the money he saved from his part time job. In front of Karasuno, standing with a neon yellow jacket as if saying; “Fuck yeah, I’m right here, baby, no one can miss me!”

He feels stupid and feels so weird wearing something so yellow it makes him feels closer to the sun. No, it feels like there are two suns. He’s going to get a heatstroke like this, so he decided to just take off the neon jacket and stands there for another twenty minutes in a black tee, soaked thoroughly. He should’ve come here at winter. This is a bad idea.

Trying to wait until Karasuno’s summer practice game is over just to meet Tsukishima is a bad idea.

But what the hell. His life is like a compilation of bad idea. Like… having him was his parent’s bad idea, and then getting him moved back with them was another of their bad idea but agreeing to them was his, and them getting a divorce was another example, his father re-married was also one, he then just decided to get a scholarship at America was… yeah, his bad idea. It’s like that, idiot thoughts, one after another, one leads to another.

One more bad idea wouldn’t hurt him. Like that one time, how one more gulp of coke wouldn’t hurt him even though he was very full and then he went and ate a mentos and then he just threw up in front of Bokuto who still wouldn’t let it down, but he thinks it’s because that was the only time he acted more idiot than the shorter male. A genius like him doing something so idiot is such a memorable event. Oops, wrong example.

Fuck, this isn’t going to end well, as much as one more gulp of cola after eating mentos wasn’t.

“Kuroo-san?”

He flinches in surprise and turns around and greets in English then realizes how stupid and douchebag-ish he must’ve sound to be greeting Hinata using English while he is in Japan.

“Uwoooohh! It really is Kuroo-san!” the boy, still hasn’t passed 165 cm it seems, shouts excitedly much like an overexcited puppy than a crow like what his school named after. “Are you on break? How is America? Ah! More importantly, teach me how to block! Pleeeaasseee? Stingy-shima wouldn’t teach me!”

“Hoi, hoi… calm down, Chibi-chan. Hahah… I’ll teach you later, alright?”

“Lucky!”

“Oi, Hinata!”

“Kageyama! Look who’s here!”

He really should stop Hinata from making too much fuss about him being there because it would ruin the surprise.

He’s not sure what is supposed to be a surprise, though.

“Kuroo-san, good afternoon.”

“Hey.”

And then Yamaguchi’s voice rings in the air, calling out to his friend; “Tsukki! Wait for me!”

‘Fuck.’

Blond hair, glasses. His knees trembling so hard he could fall right now.

“Kuroo-san…?”

“Hey, ‘sup?”

“On a break?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

There’s an awkward silence and Kuroo feels the tension of anticipating someone to break the silence with a simple, “Awkward~.”

No one broke the silence with that word, let alone that ridiculous tone, only Tsukishima telling Yamaguchi he’s going to leave the freckled boy there and go home himself.

“Tsukki!”

It was his voice, not Yamaguchi’s. For once, he feels like he isn’t making a bad choice.

Tsukishima stops at his track and turns, staring at him dead in the eyes. “Yes?”

“I, uh… you see… uhm… I… kinda didn’t tell my parents about me coming… so I was wondering if… you know, if I could… crash at your house, or something?”

Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

“Sorry, there’s no more room.”

“Uh, I can take the cou—”

“No, Kuroo-san. There’s no room.”

He knows how to take a ‘no’ for an answer, but he just can’t seem to stop stooping so low. “The floor, then!”

The blond narrows his eyes, brows knitted together and forming deep creases between them. “No.”

He feels stupid. And humiliated by himself. But mostly stupid for thinking this was going to work out. It’s pretty much the same as kicking a kid’s puppy and offering the kid a new one. Only worse.

“Kuroo-san?”

Oh, snap. He forgets about the bystanders. Yeah, he can feel the humiliation more clearly this time. So not cool. But everything just goes out the window with him whenever Tsukishima is involved.

“Sorry, Chibi-chan, maybe next time, yeah?”

“Oh, man.”

Hinata looks really disappointed, but Kageyama flicks the shorter male on the head. That setter seems to be catching up on things. He’s sharper that Kuroo first thought. “He said next time, dumbass. Stop whining.”

After apologizing for something that isn’t really worth apologizing for—yeah, because Kuroo is just cool like that—Kageyama drags the small blocker away, saying they should get home and get ready for the summer camp in Tokyo tomorrow.

Yup, definitely catching up on things, that setter.

* * *

The good thing about being back in Tokyo is that Akaashi is always the reliable one. No place to sleep? Akaashi’s got it. Hungry? Akaashi’s got it. Needing to hitchhike to the summer camp? Akaashi’s got it.

Life is much simpler and he imagines it must be good being Bokuto.

“So, does Tsukishima know you’re here?”

“Yup.”

“Does he know you’re going to be at the camp?”

“He’s clever; I figure he’s figured it out.”

“Does this whole crashing and visiting your old team have anything to do with your messy break up?”

“N…yes.”

“Kuroo-san, no offense, but the situation you’re in is a mess.”

“I am a mess.”

His coach might buy his ‘I wanna see how strong my old team has become!’ bullshit, but he knows Tsukishima won’t. That boy is too sharp for his own good.

“Kuroo-san, the bus is here.”

“M’kay.”

Maybe if he imagines it hard enough, his life won’t be such a mess.

No such luck.

* * *

“Kuroo-san, you know you annoy me, please stop it.”

It’s the last day. He hasn’t talked with Tsukishima because he couldn’t get a hold on that lanky blond and now that he has the chance, he ruins it. He is nothing more than an annoyance Tsukishima can’t get rid of.

“Tsukki—”

“Was breaking up with me not enough?”

“I didn’t mean to annoy you, I swear. But you keep avoiding me and it’s really hard to get you talk like you used to and—”

“Of course it’s hard, Kuroo-san, what do you expect? Do you want me to go; ‘Oh, hello! You were that boyfriend who broke up with me ‘cause you want to study abroad, right? Fancy meeting you here! No, no, I’m fine, it’s not awkward at all talking with you!’ like that?”

Obvious sarcasm is obvious.

“No! I just… I need to know that you’re alright.”

“I was until you came and tried to hold an awkward conversation with me!”

“I’m sorry! Okay? I’m sorry, this is messed up and it’s all my fault and I’m sorry!”

“It’s not gonna cut it.”

“What do you want me to do? Kowtowing in front of you right here right now? Because that I can do.”

“No! I don’t want you to do anything! Please, just leave me alone.”

Yeah, that he should do. He doesn’t want the new captain with that sleepy face comes running after him for making Tsukishima cries. Ennoshita is a bit scarier than Sawamura at that.

Kageyama must be so disappointed by him wasting this chance.

“I’m sorry…”

“I know you are.”

“I really am.”

Tsukishima wipes his tears, and Kuroo wish it was his hand doing that swiping motion. But it’s not.

“It might’ve been better if you say that four months ago.”

It rings in his ears even after Tsukishima leaves after making sure his voice isn’t trembling.

That was his only chance. Tomorrow he must be on his way back to America, back on living on a diet solely consisting three cups of coffee and crackers or burgers if life is kind enough while getting his summer assignments done.

* * *

He is spent and he is lethargic and his body is sticky with sweat and he wants nothing but a shower and some sleep, and it would be nice if only he can just fall asleep in the shower but that would be very selfish of him so he drags himself under the pouring water and tries to keep himself awake.

Andrew is very kind to wake him up for dinner and he regrets suddenly that he forgot to tell Bokuto about Andrew, but he didn’t even meet the ex-ace, so maybe he’ll text about it sometime, when he is sober and not tired of the shit life puts him through and not constantly thinking about how he messed all of this up.

Dinner is just five piece of toast with strawberry jam and Andrew talks about how funny it is that being a college student also means getting the permission eating dinner for breakfast and breakfast for dinner. He fails to find the humor in that, but he laughs anyway.

The toast is too dry for him and he chokes on it a few times. The strawberry jam is good and he remembers how Tsukishima likes strawberry shortcake and he suddenly wants to eat some, so he closes his eyes and imagines that the toast with jam is a piece of Tsukishima’s favorite food.

That night, he finds solace in Andrew’s “It’s just homesick, bro.”

And then he realizes that his house was never a home and the only place he feels like home is by Tsukishima’s side.

And that’s gone now.

It’s just homesick.

He’s just homesick

But, damn, if Tsukishima was his home the he’s sure as hell a homeless now.


End file.
